Your SECURITY In Marriage: 

Outline Of Issues To Agree Upon For A Successful Union

Onyekachukwu Ukeje

You may ask or want to ask,

The reason for the so much tension and sometimes total breakdown in marriages is assumption. Assumption that the other party in the marriage relationship understands or will understand; that he/she knows what to do or will know what to do; that he/she is too weak or too strong, too wise or too foolish, etc.

Many enter into marriage with a lot of assumptions; without proper understanding, planning and agreement on how to live life after the vows and the ceremony of wedding. Many spend their weeks, months and years preparing for the ceremony and a small percentage of that time planning for life after the wedding.


I believe there are four main reasons for engagement or courtship during engagement, whichever way you choose to look at it:

A Time To:

  • Get to know and understand each other more
  • Get to know each other’s family more
  • Plan how to live together, which by the way I think is the most important with understanding each other more following
  • Plan for wedding, all the processes involved including the honeymoon, and this I think is the least important.

We can now begin to see the tragedy: that which is the most important is given the place of least importance and the one of least importance is given the place of highest priority. 

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